Mom's memory

Today Mom got a perm. It takes about two-and-a-half hours to get it done and by the time we got home and I got her lunch fixed, she was exhausted.

Alzheimer's is a funny disease. I've researched and read and read about it, but nothing really prepares me for what Mom does or how she is reacting to this disease.

My sister came over for one of her hour-long visits this afternoon after we had gotten home from the perm and she asked Mom if she was wearing the same top she wore to get her hair done. Mom responded immediately, which surprised me because I thought she wouldn't remember. However, she told my sister that she had three or four shirts just like the one she was wearing. And she had gotten them when she went to school. I wasn't quite sure what she meant, so I asked her what school. She said the school in Spokane. She graduated from Lewis and Clark High School in Spokane in about 1938.

I think it's interesting how her mind connected a shirt she is wearing in 2010 with clothing she wore when she went to high school 72 years ago. I want to know but of course I never will. I had to turn away so she and my sister wouldn't see my tears.

And on our way to the hair salon, everything was new to her. All the flowers in the neighbors' yards, the trees, business signs, they were all like she had never seen them before. I guess that's the one positive thing about this disease -- that everything seems new.

As I think about Mom's past behavior and look for signs of when this disease began, I remember going to the Oregon Coast (Pacific City is one of our favorite spots) about three years ago. As we traveled along the Columbia River on Oregon's border, Mom asked what all that water was. I just couldn't believe she couldn't remember the Columbia River, so I reminded her where we were going and what river it is. She just shrugged it off and said she had forgotten. But that was one of the signs that this disease was raising its ugly head.

It seems I've been in denial a long time. I just didn't want to see that something might be happening to the woman who had been my Rock all my life. I know I shrugged it off as old age. But it wasn't.

We're going to make another trip to the Oregon Coast the end of September, thanks to a generous gift from my evil cousins. I must remember to be prepared for anything and that all of that scenery we've seen about 85,000 times will be new to Mom. And as I learn to look at things through her eyes, it will be new to me too. That will make the trip even more special.